What if parenting was viewed as an opportunity to learn more about one self? What if our children serve as the platform for growth throughout this amazing time of life? With this approach parents can reap the harvest of their own joyful existence as well as their children’s.
How can parents grow a healthy “self” garden?
Let’s Begin with good soil…
Soil is the foundation to a healthy, productive garden; but what does the soil of your garden need to be fertile?
The answers can be found with self inquiry… ask yourself,
What am I good at, what makes me happy, what makes me sad, what motivates me to do my best, what makes me uncomfortable, what make me angry or peaceful?
Sew the seeds of change…
If you answer yourself honestly, now is the time to act consciously. Put attention on your needs, wants and desires and seek ways to experience their fulfillment. You will no doubt be pleasantly surprised with how fruitful the soil in your garden will become.
Now water your garden…
Provide the moisture that keeps your garden healthy and strong. Pay attention to ways that you can tend to your own needs. It is possible to carve out time for you! Ask for help when needed and return the help in kind to others.
Add nutrients…
Take time to feed your body nutritious foods, slow down and pay attention to what is at the end of your fork. The demands on you are great and fueling yourself consciously will help to keep you going with enthusiasm.
Add fertilizer…
Counter negative feelings and self judgement; engage in personal development to counter the pesky feelings. Take a writing course, an art class, or sign up for a yoga or movement program. Make the time to give yourself the “me” time you so justly deserve. Recharge your batteries so you have the energy to engage with those who look to you for help with their needs.
A must is Sunshine… Smiles and laughter
Find humor in the small things, laugh at yourself and give permission to others to do the same. Put away the technology and be present to yourself and others around you. Listen, share and connect, these are all sure to raise smiles for everyone in your garden.
Believe in your garden…
Even well tended gardens have invasive influences that cause imperfections in the fruit. Allow for these spots, they make you who you are.
Now Nurture…
Time is Fleeting with your children. Savor every moment and live by the example of honoring your self, spots and all. Keep the relationship fertile, your children are watching and learning. Before long they will be out making their own way in the world, with their own spots.
Harvest…
During Harvest Season preserve the person you were meant to be and encourage the life your child was meant to live. Preserve the core of who they are by being a living example of who you are. Harvest self-respect, self-love and the glorious abundance of you! Remember that when you peel back the spotted surface, you reveal the sweetness and goodness underneath.
Finally Give Thanks…
Give yourself gratitude for all that you offer your amazing child, who will in turn offer the world. Thank them for the invitation that they offered you in growing yourself. Know that you have cultivated an environment where the truest self is encouraged and honored.
Now that is truly a joy filled, abundant harvest worth growing!
Mary Wheately received her parent coaching certification through the Parent Coach International® program offered through Seattle Pacific University, the only accredited Graduate Level parent-coaching program offered in the United States.
Mary Wheatley is also the founder of Inspired Parent Coach and the creator of newest series, Inspired Parent Summit II, to which she invited LifeWays’ own Mary O’Connell as a guest speaker. You may enjoy Mary O’Connell’s interview, from October 2018, here.